Anxiety is such a dirty little word especially for those like myself who suffer silently with anxiety most of my life.
When I was five years old, I can remember my grandma making me fried eggs and toast before catching the bus every morning and every single day. I would get nausea, I would throw up, my heart would be beating so fast, feeling like my tummy was upside down. It was terrifying at my age of five at the time.
The effects of Anxiety can be paralyzing to out right full blown literal panic attacks. Not everyone experiences anxiety in the same way everyone has a unique experience.
Things were no better as a teenager yet Istill did not know that what I was experiencing had a name called Anxiety. I was a kid, what the heck could I have to worry about? Yeah I heard that a lot from people my entire life.
I knew I felt terrible, I knew that something didn’t seem right. Yet I couldn’t explain it to anyone. I had no words to express what it was that I was feeling.
As an adult I learned that I had anxiety although I didn’t use pharmaceutical medications for long term as they didn’t seem to really help anything, only mask it and even that was a bit half arsed to be honest.
I have learned a lot these past few years. I learned that I had been suffering from a rare neurological brain disease called pseudo tumor ceribri my entire life, and No, learning this did not help my anxiety at all and in many ways made it very much worse.
I wanted to write this blog post because I wanted to reconnect the disconnect in the thinking that just because someone looks normal and healthy, or perfectly fine doesn’t mean they are not suffering an invisible illness and that you really have no idea what is happening inside the other person, especially if that other person is a child.
Children do not have the knowledge or ability to express the bad things they feel. So we must make sure we are valuing our children and making sure that we are disconnecting.
What I was feeling as a child was awful. Head aches, nausea, anxiety, vomiting, figiting, pacing, all sorts of nervousness. (I had a lot of other symptoms as well, but I do not know how many of those are from my illness and not purely anxiety so I wont comment about it further here.
I also learned upon reflection that I was very neglected as a child and in the seventies well it wasn’t really something people checked into then as they do now. I’m not at all saying my parents didn’t love me. My parents didn’t know how to love me the way I needed to be loved which was in a tender gentle fashion, not dysfunction junction.
This reflection taught me to be a better listener. Not just to others but also to myself. I also learned where I needed to introduce and maintain some personal boundaries.
Myself as my parents hadn’t learned anymore than they had taught me at the time so how could I know anymore on my own?
What are some ways you find useful in communicating with your kids about anxiety? Did you have any experiences like this as a child? I’d love to hear your experiences so connect here somehow by email or on facebook, twitter, youtube, pinterest etc & let me know that I’m not alone! Love Light, hugs & peace to all!
here is a beautiful link to help you out